ONENESS IN DIVERSITY ( part 2)

Societies everywhere is plagued with violent, cynical, brutish people who exist with us and whom we must learn to accommodate. These are people who are emotionally weak, intellectually impotent and who abandon reason for axes and cutlasses. These are people who lack control over their their limbs and motor co-ordinations and whose body is long disconnected from their brains. These are the people we must learn to accommodate, tolerate, and show through effective and wise choice of words impact the right standard of behavioral conducts. Yes conducts. We do not only communicate through the opening and closing of our upper and lower mandibles. Words electrify people when they are preached through our personal conduct and composure.  I decided to write this piece for a reason. This reason has to do with mankind reaction towards his fellow man whose style of worship differs from his own and as a result he views his own religion as superior by condemning his neighbors religion. Argument relating to religion has resulted into violence, massacre, blood shed and has taken the lives of innocent many along side. Religion was introduced to mankind to connect him in harmony with his fellow man but the need to feel superior lead many to heated argument during religious debate which ultimately result into violence in some unfortunate cases when one of the opponents happens to be existing in his lowest animal form.  

There are people whose phalanges quickly form a fist at any person who renders contrary opinion relating to their religion. These are people who are still existing in their crudest human form and whose mind as closed to new knowledge, whose minds are informed with biases and prejudice and are rigid to accept new information. These are the people that we share the world with and whom we must learn to understand and empathize with in order to exist successfully. When some stranger slightly push you out of sight do you engage in argument with such individual? When some touts hint some insulting words at you, do you wait and exchange words with such person?  Understand that these are people who have not yet come to themselves, who do not yet know their opinion but blindly follow the opinions of religious leaders without exercising their faculty of reasoning. How can such individual function successfully when his ability to reason is thwarted with mental prejudice, stereotype and biases? Some individuals of the opposite religion have lost their lives, have been beheaded and burnt to death by these group of brutes as a result of engaging in religion argument with them. These are people who only go in one direction and that directions is a result of the belief that has been incorporated into their subconscious by religious leaders which they hold uncritically and fail to question. Hence any contrary opinion grow in them seed of offense, anger, vexation of spirits and they retaliate the only way a crude being knows how to retaliate : They engage in physical violence and shed  blood and this gives them a sense of victory, a sense of commitment to their unique and separate God ( as they see themselves as good and obedient servant fighting for a just cause). But what justice is their in blood shed, violence and fighting? 

You see religion was brought into existence to strengthen relationships among mankind. Religion impact our being, our relationships and character. Religion although introduced for a just cause makes  and breaks bonds. It strengthens and breaks trust. Religion makes and breaks relationships, bring peace and war. But this dual characteristics aspect of religion lies in the condition of the minds of mankind. Many people don't consciously exercise their mind to think constructively. Many lack emotional maturity and accept every religion information from many religious leaders uncritically. This of course inform their emotions and actions when involved in some religious arguments. Since every  religion preach peace, the very act of violence is a result of the myopic view of the individual who lack control over his own mind. Understand that people have different grades of consciousness and that the large portion of the society are yet to know their own opinion, they are only a strenuous upholder of opinions that are passed to them by some religious leaders. Hence engaging in heated argument with such people in matters surrounding religion can end up badly. 

Thanks for reading this argument. I dedicate this article to the Almighty God who is the source of knowledge and inspiration. 

Written by: Uwagboe Anthonia Peace.

                 HONOR YOUR CALLING

"To thyself be true.... Shakespeare".

 Do you feel out of alignment? Do you feel a deeper yearning? You see you are created for a purpose. You have a part to play in this world. There is a place where you truly belong in the whole, the place where you function well the most, the place where you most fit. I like to make use of this example, assuming you are a steering wheel and your part belong in a car, but instead you chose to function as a Tyre you will not fulfill your purpose in this regard, in fact you will not experience speed because your nature is not to make contact with the tarred road, rough road or the ground but to guard the Tyre and the whole arsenal of vehicle in the direction that it should go. It would end up being a total disappointment and a sense of satisfaction will be far from reach. This is exactly how many people are. They are out of alignment with their true purpose on earth, they are not honoring their calling, they are not paying attention to the inner signal, that subtle voice within. They lack a sense of direction because they have become the steering wheel instead of the Tyre. We are created for a purpose. if we fail to align ourselves to the proper place we are called to occupy on earth we will experience low satisfaction which many seek to reach by immersing themselves in consumerism. The happiness that comes from staying in our proper place can't be gotten from material things. People who have discovered and go after their callings are less concern about material things. Not that all these life necessity don't matter to them but when they talk they don't place emphasizes on all these things but place emphasis on what truly bring them alive, what excites them, what they intend to achieve in the sense of contributing positively to others with their talents, their gift, how a sense of contributing make them feel alive. People who lack a sense of purpose usually place too much emphasis on material things, their whole goal is to get the promotion, get an increase in salary which brings them a short term happiness anyway. To a man of purpose all these are added benefit that comes from the life that is experiencing a true sense of calling. Promotion, big salaries, new cars, awards, trophies, houses which many people are after only stand as a added benefit and not the means of happiness of those who are truly in their place of assignment on earth. When you honor your calling, you will achieve your full potential. 

Honoring your calling starts with listening to that voice within. There is this inbuilt inner compass within each of us that whisper to us the direction we should go in life. This whisper has a way of escaping through our fingers, legs, voice  our body and our actions. This whisper flow through our being with love. Hence they serve as hint to where we really belong on earth. While some people easily obey the voice within by aligning themselves to their place of calling others find it difficult to follow that path providence has found for them because they are afraid of being laughed at, are afraid of being called a weirdo, are afraid of being rejected, are afraid of being called crazy are afraid of the negative attitude of society. They are afraid to accept the place of their calling because of the challenges associated with going through that path alone. These challenges are often psychological torture  arising from societal negative attitude in accepting them for what they really represent . The three personalities that I truly respect for their courage in the entertainment industry are Derinle Ebun, Lagbaja, and Charly boy. These three personalities did not yield to societal negative attitude against them. There achievement in this regard is a heroic one. These three personalities insisted upon themselves. They embraced the nature and requirement of their talents. This of course takes a lot of psychological and emotional  breakthrough. Derinle's courage blew my mind the most as he shared  his experiences on Tv while he was being interviewed by a presenter. Imagine getting on a bus and every passengers started alighting the bus simply because you appeared abnormal to them. Imagine wearing a long heel boots, jackets of many zips and bottoms paired with crazy accessories and wearing a lengthy wig on your head and every one starts starring and keep  imagining if you really are normal. Imagine the kind of treatment Lagbaja experienced when he first came out all dressed up in a modern masquerade costume, imagine the way he was received by the member of his own family, imagine the psychological pain he went through when members of his environment sees his concept or idea as a crazy one, imagine the whole psychological and emotional processes that accompanies adjusting to the demand of his calling.  What about Charley boy? Imagine the whole accusation and negative attitude thrown across the internet against his kind of life style, imagine the emotional and psychological pain that accompanies such challenges.  It takes courage remain true to ones calling in such tough moments. It take lots of courage to endure such negative attitude from the society. Being courageous requires that we learn to stand alone and draw strength from ourselves. Being courageous require that we accept our calling and that internal light that guide us in the right direction. Being courageous requires we accept ourselves as different and unique individuals and as such expect to be treated differently. We are social being. We are species that seek to form bonds. Our nature require that we exist in relationships. The core aspect of our existence lies in forming bonds. Our first relationship in the word starts with our families who develop us and help us to form bonds in the society. As a result we have learned to follow norms and voices which are planted in our subconscious right from childhood. The voices of parents, siblings, spiritual figures, public figures friends and teacher lies strongly beneath our subconscious which form our beliefs, value and which guide our decisions. In every individuals exist that subtle voice, that divine compass which tend to instruct us to follow a certain direction in life. Many find it difficult to yield this voice because it tend to lead them beyond the mainstream, convention or orthodox as those numerous voices tend to shut that divine voice. Going away from convention often means standing alone, often means going through mental, emotional and psychological challenges as members of society or friends and families often act as obstacles in the way of fully expressing our true nature. 

The prize of greatness is attached to suffering. The nature of this  suffering is often time emotional, mental and psychological. Being courageous is an integral aspect of honoring ones calling. The willingness to insist upon yourself, to stand alone, to reason for yourself, to refuse to conform to norm is a heroic achievement. When you learn to think for yourself you grow in wisdom and understanding. When you understand that different kind of people with different grades of knowledge, nature of thinking, grades of exposure and understanding exist with you within your immediate environment and society at large you will learn to treat people with empathy and rise above chaos  and challenges that accompanies your nature of talent. Society often think they know what your duty is. They strive to instruct your every action and when you don't conform they treat you as an outcast or an Alien.  You have to insist upon yourself, let your true nature speak. Develop emotional maturity, develop courage because this is what you need especially when that path providence found for you is new. Soon enough society will come to accept you as you are and recognize your place among the independent thinkers. The major reason majority don't honor their calling is because they have not learned to think for themselves, they  let many voices cloud their sense of self. You have to express your true nature in order to experience meaning and purpose in life. Making the choice to stand alone despite opposition is an heroic achievement.  When you understand that this torturous and lonely journey is for the greater good you will experience a sense of purpose, you become one with the divine within and you will find meaning even in suffering emotionally and psychologically. 

Thanks for reading this article. I dedicate this article to God Almighty who is the source of inspiration and knowledge. 
Written by : Uwagboe Anthonia Peace. 

                                        

   THE POWER OF PURPOSE

"What we call talent is our assigned work on earth- Tonia".

As mankind we are interdependent creatures filled with limitless capacities and  unique characteristics to the attainment of a common goal. Life is structured in such a way that each of us has a part to play in it. And the part we choose to play in life is influenced by that internal signal. There is a plan in which each of us fit and until we make ourselves available and fit in that plan we will experience meaninglessness. Discovering our part in that plan give us a sense of purpose. The part each of us play in this plan enable us tap fully our potentials, enable us fully develop our talents, give us a sense of purpose and significance. The specific part we choose to devote our creativity permeate the entire parts or whole. The unique characteristics each of us possess direct us to fit into a specific part in this plan which ultimately give us a sense of meaning, fulfillment, satisfaction and joy. We are all creature connected by necessities. We all have needs and we are all required to meet needs. A car for example represents a plan. We know the basic function of a car is for the purpose of transportation. Within a  car contain several components or parts which have a unique structural characteristics and which are also interdependent on one another for the proper functioning of the car. These different parts that exist within a car are created for specific purposes and are  assembled to achieve a common goal. Now, assuming these parts are not aligned in their proper position within the plan, then these parts will not fully achieve their true potential, the full purpose of the plan will it be achieved and the effort to make them work in harmony will be frustrated. This is exactly how people are. They are not in their proper niche, hence they fail to experience a sense of purpose and meaning which is the reward of being in ones place of calling. 

Each of us as mankind possess unique characteristic features which yearn for expression. When we fail to position ourselves in our proper place in life our unique features will not be fully expressed. Your purpose is to act on that which lies within you. When you discover what lies within you your eyes will be opened to the plan you belong. By align in ourselves to our field of interest we play a significant role in converting greatness into wealth and we find meaning in our work. What we call talent is our assigned work on earth. Perhaps you love football, cars, books, fashion, perhaps you love to be a make up artist, perhaps you love talking. All these are clues to where your interest really lies. Of course loving football does not necessarily mean you have a talent for playing football in the field. There are many positions surrounding the game of football. Football as a game is the center which comprises several components ( positions) that ensures successful functioning of the game. The commentators, the players, the referee, the coach, the football presenter, the Keeper etc all share a common love for football as a game. This love act as the clue which draw them to function in a specific position where they truly express their gifts, where they find a sense of purpose and experience meaning in life. 

Now what happen when you are not connected to your true calling? You get bored, frustrated, and unhappy. When you align yourself to your place of calling you focus your power into something bigger. When you know your calling you see life in a new light, you see yourself playing a part in it. You begin to know the reason for your existence. Life excited you, you become passionate about what truly matters in life which is service to humanity. The man who has not discovered and aligned himself to his place of calling on earth sees promotion, increase in salary, new cars and houses as a bonus of his effort and not necessarily the reason he works. A man who has not discovered purpose is only concerned with what he can get and not what he can give. I do not mean "giving" in term of philanthropy, i mean in term of playing ones part in extending positive influence to the wider society through ones effort. Do you picture yourself being happy in a laboratory mixing chemicals? Do you picture yourself as a make up artist despite the fact that you have a degree in pharmacology? You see people place so much respect on some talents and despise other talents seeing them as less significant. The truth is that we are all connected and no one talent is greater or superior than the other. The talent that people look down upon are not necessarily small, they are only less recognized. You have to be true to yourself if you really want to experience meaning and peace of mind in life. When you are in your place of calling love flow through your effort. See yourself as a team player in that place providence has found for you. A successful team requires the effort of everyone and that part you play in that team has a significant impact in the whole. When you realize you are a team player in that specific plan your calling direct you you will realize how important and significant you are. Don't  look down on your talents, grow it, nurture it and fulfill your unique purpose on earth.

Thanks for reading this article. I dedicate this article to God Almighty who is the source of inspiration and knowledge. 
Written by: Uwagboe Anthonia Peace. 

                                                  

DESPERATE FOR THE RING ( single with a purpos)

I decided to write this article for some genuine reason as followed 1. I am still single 2. I want to pass some knowledge to my single sisters 3. You knew what they say, never take advice from a single sister when you are married, hence this topic is exclusively directed to single sisters.  Some people may be offended by the topic " desperate for the ring". First let me point out my reason for choosing such topic. Many of us don't see "the ring" beyond a fancy adornment that beautify our middle finger and announces our status without us saying a word. This superficial knowledge of what the ring really represent is what make many fail to fulfill purpose in marriage. The ring is a symbol of unity, wholeness completeness and eternity. Since the ring symbolizes the Union of two people, then we may want to ask the question, Union for the purpose of what? Here is where majority of us are missing it because we lack purpose for our lives we are not concerned with developing ourselves, to prepare ourselves for what lies ahead of us in the future hence we do all the whole relationship thing wrongly and end up in bad marriages. 

Being single is seen as a plague in many societies. Majority of people have a bad impression about single-hood. If you belong to captain age group and unmarried some people tend to treat you with less respect than you deserve. The psychological and emotional torture that accompanies such poor treatment lead many matured single to make unhealthy choices which eventually lead many into disempowering relationships and marriages. To overcome all these relationship incidence is important that we develop ourselves by 1. Finding ourselves 2. Discovering our purpose 3. Building ourselves. 

FIND YOURSELF: before I go into detail with this sub-topic, I had like the reader to answer these questions personally.  It is important that you travel through your mind and sincerely tell yourself the truth. Being sincere to yourself by answering these questions is a step forward to embracing change and being that individual God really wants you to be. Who are you? What do you want from life? How often do you make significant decisions for yourself? Do you easily dismiss your own opinion and take up the opinions of others without reasoning? Are you really an independent thinker? Do you prefer giving the opinions of some spiritual leaders or sages in order to avoid being judged? How often do you exercise your faculty of independent reasoning? Do you fear being different among your coworkers or friends? How often do you dare to stand alone? What are your value system? What are your belief system? Do you have a low self esteem of yourself? Matured singles tend to experience so much pressure in many societies and the inaudible chorus that is expressed in the look and gait of many that they are surrounded by is "GO GET MARRIED". The large portion of people in many societies condemn singleness and overrate marriage. The truth is our minds have been conditioned in such a way that we see singleness as a threat. The mindset may have come from our basic nature as a social specie since as mankind we tend to form bond with people, neighbors, friends, family, business associates and since our whole existence is tied to forming bonds, we tend to feel cut off or alienated when we are outside the bond of marriage. Because we fail to find ourselves we fall victim of the consequences of poor choices. Because we have become too dependent on the opinions of public figures and the opinions of many in the society we fail to develop our faculty of independent reasoning. Thinking for yourself make you develop a mind of your own. But their is a difference between thinking for yourself and processing other people's opinion to arrive at your own conclusion. Exercising your faculty of independence does not mean you dismiss the opinions or advice of other people, it means you are open minded enough to listen and make your own personal decision. Understand that every individuals process their thoughts differently and since majority of individuals have not yet known their opinions their is a high possibility that their thoughts are or view points are about you are often clouded by biases, stereotype and prejudice. Love yourself, grow your mind, evolve psychologically, emotionally and mentally. When you fail to develop all these faculties you easily succumb to other people's negative view of you and when a man appears from nowhere you don't care if the two of you are compatible to some degree or share the same value system, you just desperately accept his proposal and cover up regret, pain, and depression with some motivation quotes on social media. But people are too smart for that, they will notice. The truth is you can't find yourself if you don't learn to think for yourself. Finding yourself means you have to be courageous to accept the real you. Many individuals today are clone figures of many others. They don't have power over their lives, their decisions, their actions. Finding yourself is the basis for being the very person that you have to be in life to feel successful at a personal level. 

" God will not have his work made manifest by cowards- Ralph Waldo Emerson".

DISCOVER YOUR PURPOSE: you can't manifest that light within you when you fail to discover your purpose. You can't manifest that light within when you continue to make the crowd your shield.  To many the ring is a sign of protection. Protection from shame. To many the ring is a shield. To many the ring is where they draw their sense of self esteem and when the topic of singles or the unmarried arises in many religious gathering, streets, public gathering and many spots gossips assemble they feel esteemed in their own eyes and feel like they have just escaped from some embarrassment. Marriage should not be seen as a means of covering up emptiness but a means of blessing your partner with your gift. The discovery of purpose is an essential aspect of living a life of adventure. When you discover your purpose life become meaningful to you. When you discover your purpose and follow through you see yourself as someone who is significant, who is needed and someone whose action has significant impact in the whole. 

BUILD YOURSELF: to have power over your life you have to consciously grow your mind. Being single is a period to grow yourself . The period for self discovery, the period to grow in confidence, the period to grow in knowledge. Be willing to learn. All these virtues are not meant for a selected few, you have to earn it. If you fail to pursue all these life requirement for the successful development of your being the "wedding ring" will end up becoming a shield that cover up void in your life. 

Thanks for reading this article. I dedicate this article to God Almighty who is the source of inspiration and knowledge. 

Written by : Uwagboe Anthonia Peace. 

                   DON'T QUIT
Giving up our dreams appear to be the easier choice, the less stressful choice than holding on to them. The thought of giving up can be painful due to the feeling of guilt that accompanies such thought. Since we are creatures equipped with the ability and freedom to make choices we tend to device some strategic means to make our actions less painful. We come up with good enough reasons to help us cope with our decisions. We form bonds with others who feed is with information that support our actions. As a result of the feeling of guilt that accompanies the thought giving up their dreams, many consciously seek companies that support their decision to give up. They listen to woe tales, failure stories , exaggerated set back experiences shared by some circle of quitters which ultimately raise self doubt, and encourage them to give up their dreams thus making the giving up process less painful. 

Because our deepest dreams are often ties to our conscience many strive to overcome the feeling of guilt (that accompanies giving up their dreams) by blaming outside circumstances,their partners, their boss, unfavorable socioeconomic condition, their coworkers etc,thus excluding themselves completely from taking part in their share of the blame. Since quitting is less stressful but more painful due to the guilt that accompanies giving up a long cherished dream that give life to one existence many develop strategic means to manage the situation. Many form bond with some group of mediocre who lack dreams, purpose and drive , they pay attention to failure stories by seeing people who have given up on their dreams, they blame the challenges surrounding their dreams and completely exclude themselves from the blame in order to protect their ego, and they justify their reason for giving up on circumstances beyond their control. 

The truth is our action on this regard often serve as defense mechanism which help us protect our ego and make us not to see ourselves from the angle of failure or loser. Because the thought of seeing ourselves as failures or loses is painful and rob negatively on our self esteem. Before you give up, think about why you started, thinking should never be an option. Quitting may win you a lot of mediocre and so much comfort but it will never make you taste the sweetness of an accomplished dream or give up the opportunity to share the success stories of others who aspire to bring their dreams into reality. Avoid giving credit to doubt by exercising personal power which help you maintain a long commitment to your dream through difficult periods and times of setback. The truth is we all have capacity to stretch our mind and improve beyond our present reality. Integrating this fact into our psyche help us adjust our emotions and help us maintain internal balance when faced with change and stress it accompanies. The truth is that no amount of "excuses" can fill that void in you than your dreams and purpose in life. 

Thanks for reading this article. I dedicate this article to the Almighty God who is the source of   knowledge and wisdom.
Written by: Uwagboe Anthonia Peace 

       THE  EVIL VEGETABLES

In many cities, streets, abandoned building and many street corners exist teenagers, young adults and old men who are victims of certain vegetables substances. These are dead walking men, lost people, people with cases of psychosis, schizophrenia, who as a result of long term dependent on cocaine and meth become street wanderers. Many individuals who out of the need to gain acceptance by members of some groups in many societies take certain kind of vegetable in order to raise their esteem and grow their confidence among peers. 

Vegetable in its native and unaltered state help in the cleansing and facilitation of bowel movement but man in an attempt to raise his esteem and sell confidence to his fellow man convert vegetable to alcohol, cocaine, ecstasy, Meth and more which is fellow man willingly buy use and blame other for the evil that accompanies his long term dependent on this substances. Many are trapped,frightened, depressed, lost and unsure of their next fix. The product of vegetable which once brought them into a state euphoria, excitement, has led many into a state of despair, disappointment, shame, and the feeling of abandonment and rejection fill the space of love and care as close friends have distanced themselves from them and some family members show no concern and empathy. The entire body system of some promising kids have been disrupted by this substances which they seek to regain by getting a new fix in order to remain functional and gain mental and physical balance. Every glass of alcohol and every intake of cocaine leads to the loss of control of their limbs. Family happiness are sacrificed at the expense of getting a new fix again  and again. Many have lost relation with people as they exhibit psychosis behavior and communicate with the spirit of cocaine in the form of seeing what others can't see, hearing what others can't hear and the feeling of bug bite under their skin  which comes from the impairment of their cognition. 

Despite the mountain of evidence surrounding the use of drugs and the statistics of cocaine related death, alcohol and meth related incidences which lead many siren straight in the direction of the morgue and jail many still fail victim of alcohol, meth and cocaine etc. The need to raise self esteem and confidence has led many to the emotional state of despair, regret, shame, pain as their hopes and dreams crash with every intake of meth, cocaine, heroine and ecstasy.  The believe that drug raise ones self esteem is delusional, it is simply a lie, an illusion. Drugs may provide you a temporal escape from some undesirable situations you are experiencing but it leaves lasting negative effect in you as shame, regret fill the space of temporal confidence it gives. Before you take that cocaine, that meth, think and be sure if it is worth the price of your life, your dreams and goals . Meth, cocaine, heroine and ecstasy are evil vegetables. You do not want to be another statistics, do you? 

Thanks for reading this article. I dedicate this article to the Almighty God who is the source of wisdom and knowledge. 

Written by: Uwagboe Anthonia Peace 

         HOW TO SPOT A TRUE FRIEND 

In the course of our lives we come across some people who we are attracted to based on their approach, kind nature, intelligence, friendliness, general disposition, and because we thought in our minds they were good people  as a result of all the good qualities that appear visible and appealing to us, we decide to be their friends. Along the line, our relationships with them becomes shaky as a result of differences in personal interest, personal goals, view points, value systems, belief system, life experiences, level of exposure and emotional intelligence. Sometimes we are amazed by their level of inconsideration, lack of concern they manifest and their willingness to sacrifice the relationship over some argument and misunderstanding and then we conclude in our minds that they gave us a false impression of who they really are the first time we met them.  Realizing how easily they disengage emotionally from us we then begin to understand  how insignificant we have been in their lives and we begin to tell ourselves they are not good people and have been pretending all along. 

 Because as mankind our existence is tied to forming bond, to forming relationship with others, we feel a sense of regret, disappointment and we feel betrayed when these people we believe to be our friends start to show their true nature. The sense of disappointment, betrayal and regret we feel towards their willingness to walk out of the relationship is a result of how much we hold our relationship with them in high esteem. Unfortunately the connection these kind of people make with us is often not deep because it is tied to some selfish motives. These kind of people make a huge scene out of small issues, come up with emotional blackmail, the become malicious towards you just to find ways to leave because what attracted them in the first place is no longer coming. A lot of time we get carried away by their friendliness but we do not see how subtly they take advantage of us. 

As mankind our lives revolve around forming bonds. We cannot function effectively outside of relationships. We yearn for relationships because it is a core aspect of our being. We were born into families where our first relationship started, then we join many social groups where different activities are assigned to us in our various schools, churches, mosque, workplace etc and on a personal level we still form bonds with lovers and friends since as individuals relationship is an integral aspect of our existence, of our lives. Since on a personal level we invest so much emotions in our relationships, we feel emotionally injured when people who we thought were our true friends start showing their true selves. To save ourselves from aches and unnecessary drama that often happen to people it is important we find out the motives behind such people's friendliness and good behavior towards us before becoming good friends with them. It is easy to spot such individuals motives. Carefully listen to what they talk about, their motives is tied to where their interest lies. A lot of time these people form bonds with you because they want something from you, and they remain with you because they are getting something from you. Often time they approach you in a friendly manner because they want to sell things to you, they want you to be their financial buddies ( a source where they can lend money when they are broke), they want you to lend them shoes and dress etc, they want to know more about your family background and history, they want a gossip partner, they want to relive themselves of boredom, they want to know more about your personal life, they want to know about your financial statue etc. These reasons because they are too ephemeral or not deeply rooted prevent them from forming strong bond with you. A lot of time to cover their dark side they come up with emotional blackmail just to make you feel guilty and as a result you give more, open up more just to erase the feeling of guilt you feel.

 As mankind we often make certain decisions which often come back to hurt us and make us feel regret. The feeling of regret, disappointment, pain when a friend drops you because you are no longer useful to them or you are no longer meeting their needs is a result of your inability to make the right choice of friend. Friendship goes beyond keeping each others company. A lot of time people just view friendship as a means of escaping boredom which is why they just accept anyone that comes to them without getting to know their true motive. Friendship goes beyond keeping each other company, it serves a deeper purpose. The quality of our friends determine the quality of our lives and it has such a huge impact in shaping our destinies. Finding yourself is at the heart of self discovery when you discover who you are. Who you are, your purpose in life, it has a huge impact in the choice of friends you keep. Never underestimate the power of friendship. People with purpose are drawn to you based on what they seek to impact and not what they want to get from you. 

Thanks for reading this article. I dedicate this article to the Almighty God who is the source of   Inspiration and knowledge.

Written by: Uwagboe Anthonia Peace